Intrusive Thoughts vs. Anxious Thoughts
Not all thoughts are experienced in the same way, which is why a coping strategy that works in one situation may not be effective in another. When a distressing thought enters our minds it’s common to want to challenge said thought or belief. While this coping tool can be beneficial for some, others experience an increase in intensity (i.e., louder, stickier, harder to let go of, etc.). This could be an indicator that you are dealing with a different kind of thought pattern.
When considering anxious thoughts, challenging the thought can be helpful by looking at evidence, exploring alternative outcomes, and reality-checking the intensity of the fear. This is because anxious thoughts usually come from fear about what might happen, the “what ifs”. These thoughts tend to focus on the future, are connected to real life concerns, and can often be eased, at least a bit, with logic and reassurance. Anxious thoughts often sound like:
What if I mess up?
What if something bad happens?
What if they are upset with me?
These thoughts are usually future focused, connected to real life concerns, and can often be eased, at least a bit, with logic and reassurance.
However, when looking at intrusive thoughts, challenging the thought can sometimes unintentionally give the thought more attention, signal to your brain that it’s important, or get pulled into a cycle of analyzing, proving and reassuring (overthinking and seeking certainty). This can result in the thought sticking around longer and feels more powerful.
Furthermore, intrusive thoughts are unwanted, automatic thoughts that can feel distressing or out of character. They often appear suddenly and are not necessarily connected to real life concerns. These thoughts tend to persist despite logic or reassurance, and can feel more intense the more you try to push them away. Intrusive thoughts often sound like:
What if I lose control and do something I’d never actually do?
Why am I having this thought and am I bad for having this thought?
Why won’t this thought go away?
These thoughts tend to feel charged with guilt, shame or fear, irrational, sudden, repetitive and hard to shake.
Key Differences between anxious thoughts and intrusive thoughts:
1. Content & Focus
Anxious thoughts are usually about real-life concerns and “what if” scenarios (e.g., finances, health, relationships).
Intrusive thoughts are often unwanted, distressing, and can feel random or out of character (e.g., taboo, violent, or irrational ideas).
2. Response to Logic
Anxious thoughts can often be eased, at least somewhat, with logic, reassurance, or problem solving.
Intrusive thoughts tend to stick despite logic and reassurance, and trying to push them away can even make them feel stronger.
A Different Approach: Changing Your Relationship to the Thought
Instead of asking, “Is this thought true?” Try asking, “How do I want to respond to this thought?”
Helpful shifts include:
1. Noticing Without Engaging
“I'm having a thought that…”
This creates a bit of space between you and the thought.
2. Allowing Instead of Fighting
Oddly enough, trying to push thoughts away often makes them stronger.
Letting them exist (without reacting) reduces their intensity over time.
3. Letting Go of Meaning Making
Intrusive thoughts say nothing about your character, intentions, or values.
They are mental noise, not messages.
4. Refocusing on the Present
Gently bring your attention back to what you’re doing, your body, or your environment.